Advice

How to offer help to someone with dementia who doesn’t want it

My mother has Alzheimers that was diagnosed early 2020 and prescribed medication. She lives alone independently and is physically very fit. She has deteriorated rapidly in the past couple of months and forgets to take her meds - and we think eat and drink if family don't go in every day, which we can't always.
We're now looking at getting carer to go in each day, but she's taken to not opening her front door and is very anti anyone going in the house. We've tried to calmly talk to her and even tell her that all over 75's get this help from the government as a thankyou! That hasn't worked.
What can we do now? I understand that even if its to her detriment in refusing help, the law is in her court (we do have LPA). I fear that she is going to rapidly go downhill and at some point get sectioned and put into care. We ant to avoid this obviously.
What can we do? And if we can't get her to accept a carer, if she reaches a point we feel she's a danger to herself and does need to be in care, how do we do that?

My mother has dementia. She very forgetful repeats herself all the time forgets appt. gets. lost driving places. argues with me all the time. stays up all night cat naps all day. calls me at work 3-4 times a day over the same thing. I have tried to talk to her primary Dr. he says she is fine everyone is noticing the problem my hands are tied I need help I am the only living child. She has called my place where I work and told them I was in the hospital and my cowoekers where looking right at me.

Hello, my grandmother is living with us and her dementia is becoming too difficult to realistically manage at home. We have spoken to her about moving into a care home but she refuses and is in denial about or doesn't understand how much care she needs. My Dad is too scared of upsetting her to put her in a care home but is reaching exhaustion (as is the whole family). What can we do to manage it or to convince my Dad that this really isn't sustainable?
Thanks

My father in law is 75. He is beyond knowing he is sick. He refuses to go to the doctor and can not understand much anymore. For example, he put dog food in the bird feeders and bird seed in the hummingbird feeders. He still drives which scares me to death. He got lost once, at night, and ended up 50 miles from his home. He is a chain smoker and is barely coherent most of the time. I'm not sure how to get him diagnosed in order to get help for my mother in law. Any help you can give is appreciated.

My mum is 88,and lives alone. Despite increasing confusion,she refuses point blank to have any kind of help,such as help in the home-she has developed increased confusion about using the washing machine for example .The situation has reached the point where when I'm at work(-Im a nurse and work 12.5 hour shifts) in spite of my partner patiently telephoning at the usual time each day to explain where I am, she makes countless telephone calls and leaves endless answerphone messages,and
gets very cross at times and even shouts at the automated messages..
!Its a very difficult,worrying and stressful situation,and I'm wondering where to turn..

My step-grandfather has all of the sudden started worrying about rental house he has not owned in over 20 years. He keeps being up that he worried about someone coming and putting us out of the house we live in now, he built the house in the 60's and had always owed it. I feel bad because I can see actual worry in his eyes, and if you know him you'd know he has never down emotion of any kind for as long as I've know him. I have tried talking to him and explaining even show him papers of ownership for his house, taking him to his old rental houses to show him that atleast one is no longer even there and he doesn't know the people living in the other. I want to try everything before increasing or putting him on more meds. Please help with any advise, if there is any

My mom blames everyone except herself for her problem. She blames my son for going into her house and moving things. My son doesn’t go near her house. He works 2 jobs. We fight if I disagree with her and if I agree with her. She is 87 years old. I don’t know how to handle her. If I’m nice she blames me for faking it. She says I don’t love her that no one does. I don’t know what to do. I took her debit cards and medical cards from her. I’m confused on how to handle her. I Love my mom and it’s breaking my heart to see a strong woman turn into this other person. I can’t get her to go to a doctor. She will not go. She hasn’t been to a doctor in over a year but she says I took her a couple weeks ago. Someone got into her house and stole her underwear then the next day someone bought a bunch of new pairs. What do I say to something like that?

Where is the real, hard core help for people with dementia that results in a stubborn inability to cooperate with anything from diagnosis to treatment? One knows there may be medications that can help symptoms and improve quality of life but you can't fore someone to allow the diagnostic testing like NRI or PET scans. Talking nice and having patience doesn't cut it.

My Father in Law has been getting very confused and forgetful lately, he has had an mri scan and a ct scan, also a visit from the memory nurses and we are awaiting the gp's referral to the memory clinic. Our issue is he is losing things abd getting very confused even more so lately but refuses to accept he has a problem. But as soon as he has lost something or something happens his first port of call is his daughter and she is struggling with the responsibility and needs help. My husband and I are willing to help to take some of the burden but we are never the first to hear if he has a problem and we only find out after the fact. What can we do to help?

Me and my family are concerned my nannan is showing signs of Lewy Body Dementia and has done for quite some time now. She lives with my grandad who refuses to accept that she isn’t herself anymore and won’t have her assessed as he’s worried she will be taken into residential care. We’ve explained that none of us want that to happen and he’s more than capable of looking after her but for her sake we need to know what we’re dealing with so we can put strategies in place. Is there a way of having her assessed without my grandads consent? He’s her next of kin, attends every appointment with her and speaks on her behalf the majority of the time.

Due to Covid, we waited almost a year to get a referral to the local memory clinic. My mother refused to see them and cancelled the appointment 3 times. They eventually came to her house to do an assessment with me present. My mother was very distressed and angry when she couldn’t answer the questions. The nurse doing the assessment didn’t seem to be able to cope with the situation and left. She phoned me to say that my mother did have cognitive impairment ( she scored 16/30 on a Cambridge assessment) but she couldn’t make a diagnosis of dementia, only a psychiatrist could do that. There is no way that my mother would agree to see anyone else. I feel as though that was our chance at diagnosis which has now gone. I’m not sure where that leaves us. My mother lives alone, I am only 10 miles away but have caring responsibilities for my sick husband.

My mother has dementia and I'm trying to find out the best way to get power of attorney over her since I know she will not do it willingly what are my options

My father has become more aggressive and argumentative of late. I’m not sure of memory loss but he is losing track of reality He has always had a tendancy to be like this but unfortunately his behaviour is getting worse to the point where I find it too upsetting to call or visit him. My mother is very frustrating because she will not acknowledge my father’s worsening behaviour and can also be rude and nasty and in complete denial that she should be helping and encouraging my father to find out if he needs help. I work in a care setting and know the earlier he gets help the better it will be for everyone.

My mother in law has dementia. My father in law is her main carer. They always used to come and visit every sunday. Be it for dinner or just coffee and cake. The last few weeks however sjes been refusing to come over. My father in law finds it very frustrating as itsa break for him too.
Does anyone have any advice.
Many thanks

My Mum has recently had a very sudden change in behaviour and memory issues. My Dad wants to get an urgent assessment of her situation (since is not mobile / suffers from COPD) but the GP Practice is saying they need her consent..... which she won't give... So how can he progress this without being check mated by GP Receptionists !? Terribly frustrating...