Real stories

Adapting to life as a young dementia carer

I’ve been caring from a young age, but have taken more of an active role since turning 18. 

“It’s something I didn’t really think about, I only found out that I was classified as a carer about a year ago after speaking with a social worker.”

I’m a naturally empathetic and supportive person and really care about making others’ lives better, so I transitioned pretty well to being a carer. After my gap year, I’ll be starting a degree in social work. I hope to work with children and young people in the future, and being a carer has given me lots of useful skills which can help me, like how to be more responsible, compassionate, and caring towards others. 

My Granny was diagnosed with vascular dementia five years ago but has had problems with her mental and physical health most of her life.  

She lives with my Grandad who is her primary carer. My parents take on more of the ‘hands-on’ care, whereas I provide more emotional support, not just for my Granny, but for my Grandad and parents too. 

Being a dementia carer is more than just looking after Granny. It’s making sure my parents and my Grandad get to have a break, making sure they can get to work or to their own appointments, and making sure there’s good communication between us so we all get the support we need. 

Challenging dementia stereotypes 

Lots of people don’t understand that dementia can impact any age group. Although I don’t have dementia myself, being a carer for my Granny means that dementia plays a big part in my life. 

“I’m not entirely sure some of my friends even know that I am a young carer. I think they might be surprised at how much it has an impact on me everyday.”

I’m not able to go out and socialise all the time, and sometimes have to cancel plans at the last minute. Because I care for my Granny and my brother who both have different needs, it can be hard balancing looking after them, and taking time for myself to be with my friends. 

I’m lucky my friends are supportive, but being a young carer can be incredibly isolating, especially if you don’t know others in similar circumstances to you, that’s where I feel caring has a big impact on my life.

“You do get a lot from it as well, as you get the opportunity to have an even closer relationship with your loved ones.”

Creating change 

I am an active volunteer for a number of organisations, Alzheimer’s Society included, and I’m a youth social activist. I’m really interested in making sure young people get our voices heard.  

“A lot of decisions are made on behalf of young people without consulting us; we’re the voices of the future, we should be listened to.”

My campaign work focuses on ensuring that young people feel confident to speak out for matters and causes they’re passionate about. I think it’s really important that young carers share their experiences, and it allows me to meet other young people who are going through something similar. 

There’s not a lot of support available here in Northern Ireland, so being able to influence decision making and policies can make a real difference, and there’s still more to be done.